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Of All Damned Things

by Herman Gauche

  • Digital Album
    Streaming + Download

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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Standard CD Jewel with encased protective Evil Eye rolling bead amuleT and 12-page lyrics booklet insert including private scenes captured inside uNeVEn recording studio. Cover art and disc art nudes by Herman Gauche with glossy color compact disc imprint.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Of All Damned Things via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Full Digital Discography Full Digital Discography

    Get all 3 Herman Gauche releases available on Bandcamp and save 35%.

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Of All Damned Things, Coronation Herm, and ...All Right With Me. , and , .

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O Captain, My Captain! The Fearful Trip is Done The Ship Has Weathered E'ry Rack The Prize We Sought is Won! The Port is Near: the Bells I Hear The People All Exulting While Follow Eyes; A Steady Keel A Vessel Grim and Daring! 'O Heart! Heart, Heart! O! Bitter Drops of Red Where On This Deck My Captain Lies, Fallen Cold + Dead O Captain, My Captain! Rise Up And Hear The Bells, Rise Up! For You The Flag Is Flung For You The Bugle Trills! For You! Bouquets And Ribboned Wreaths For You The Shores a'Crowding To You They Shout; A Swaying Mass Their Eager Faces Turning O Captain, Dear Father! My Arm Beneath Your Head It Is Some Dream That: On This Deck You've Fallen Cold + Dead My Captain Does Not Answer Me His Lips Are Pale And Still My Father! Does Not Feel My Arm He Has No Pulse Or Will The Ship is Anchored Safe and Sound The Voyage Closed and Done From Fearful Trip: The Victor's Ship Comes In With Object Won! Rise Up! O Shores And Ring A'Bells! But I With Mournful Tread Walk This Deck My Captain Lies Fallen Cold And Dead
I don't F*#%ing know what's going on anymore The writings on the wall but I been seeing double So which ways out; and which ways Trouble? Take a looksee 'Whats Inside?' Kick down the door, come to find out 'Whose behind the lies!" that you been Spreading about me, riddle my bones on a Hasbro Ouija Swing the barndoor wide, wheelbarrow My mare's manure to a garden on the side Right there behind them big-old Bushes Water it down, tie the hose on the spigot I don't F*#%ing know, so don't ask me Can't tell ya, bro F*#% if I know, confound it and F*#% me runnin' I don't F*#%ing know I don't F*#%ing know So tell me why, if you're so smart, Can't ya hear me? I'm asking you politely now Leave me the F*#% alone why dontch' Yeh I can't remember what time Precious told me to pick up ...Was it the Dry-Cleaners? I'm going down for this one this time Boys I can feel it Way down in my bones, I can't get along anymore Loosing all control of my good reputation on Hookers, and Bookers, and Comodities Traders Everybodys on the floor screaming at each other It's the biggest conflagration of high stakes Agro-Auto-Stimulation this Nations ever seen Folks call it the Stock Market. Upon which we base our entire economy What the F*#% is up with that? Nobody seems to know. Its F*#%d six-ways-to-Sunday Damned if I know what to do about it Sometimes I think I know, you know? sometimes knot. Lately things are shot and here I'm Carrying on like old Woody Guthrie at a charity auction. They say 'third time's the charm" and "Twide the Fool" but First, the golden rule: Reload Quickly 'Cause when the shit hits the fan Gotta be READY! Everybody on the floor screamin' for their lives Gunfight in the Ally everybody gonna die, but Just as the Bourbon is about to tip over... Out jumps the Leprechaun and hurdles the bar! Uncorks the Whiskey and lights a cigar Off a ricocheted buckshot he picked off the floor Walks through the doorway, wrinkles his nose and POOF! just disappears into a patch of green clover I don't know what in Sam Hell is going on around here but the writings on the wall And I been seeing Trouble Every which-a-way comin' and going Well, I'm here to tell ya I'm outta-the-loop. It may come as a surprise But got to realize, Honey I don't F*#%ing Know
Its got hold of me, I feel it pumping through my veins. I spend my days in a daze. My brains are spaghetti which I already cleaned my plate cause I’m happy as a clam to waste my mind being high, oh so high all the time. I’ve got a problem... She’s dope she’s coke she’s crack she’s smak she’s dabs and methamphedamine (know what i mean?) Man, she’s booz and quaaludes, oxycontin, marijuana weed, speed, rails and ecstasy. I’m behind the eight-ball, injectin’, free-basin’, loaded, stoned & wasted, gone fishin’, trippin’, sniffin’ huffin’ puffin’ highly stimulated, intoxicated, faded, baked & shitfaced IN LOVE! Should’ve seen it comin’ all along I’d end up, strung out on your love, I’m strung out on your love, Strung out on your love. Bloodshot (up all night) got to get up but I’ll never make it on time! My brains are behind me (which reminds me I left my beer in the shower last night) Oh No! There’s only one thing for this Hangover and it’s MORE! FOR SURE! AND MORE AND MORE AND MORE Happiness is a brown paper-bag! Yah Yah Yah Yah Yah Yah Yah And a Warm BowL of Hominy in the Morning (check that! ...afternoon:) I’m not immune I’m not amused I’m Strung Out on Your Love Strung Out on Your Love


Herman's sophomore release featuring a menagerie of performers; tapdancers; bagpipers; prophets; and vampire cowboys interspersed with phone messages from his odd-baL friends and inexplicable communiques FROM BEYOND. The cover art emerges from a nude photo-shoot with photographer Lloyd Arcesia, re-creating the falling Swan Song demi-God of Led Zeppelin whilst simultaneously evolving the ideas of primate sexual identifiers proposed by Desmond Morris. Spanning over a tireless decade of recording with intrepid producer/engineer b.Feuchtinger of uNeVEn Studios in Denver, Colorado the work is now complete and Herman has assembled 'the Legendary Heirs', a live act including many of the performers from the album, to support touring of the new materiaL.
...At a venue near You, Baby!


released November 25, 2022

Hg - vocaLs, whistles (16), rythm + lead guitar, harp
Juli Sipari - lead vocals (5), vox, keys, gong
Tim ‘Dino - bass
Jesse Dickens - drums
Kyle Miller - banjo, vox
Brian King - trumpet (1) dueling guitar #2 (10)
Kristen Helen Poppe - taps
matt12string Draper - said twelve-sting guitar, vox, voice of Thomas the Rebound (physical vs.)
Nolan Kemp - hand drums, rain stick, sailor (6)
Merielle Redwine - vox, voice of young Whatsername
Mike Pfau - Fish Looking to the Sky and Yelling As Loud As He Could (physical vs.), Announcer (17)
Daniel Kingsley - pipes
Prophet Pastor Dr. Rev. Minister Paul Huggins - self
Bryan Feuchtinger - sailor (6) Ad man (19)
Produced + Engineered by Bryan Feuchtinger,
unhemmed as it is, uNeVEn Studios 2012-2022


all rights reserved



Herman Gauche Denver, Colorado

After a decade in the works, Herman Gauche is ready to release his sophomore album "Of All Damned Things" on November 25th simultaneously debuting his new band, 'the Legendary Heirs' from Denver Colorado. Advance track "The F*lk Song" from the upcoming album has been released as a single "Coronavirus (On The Bayou!)" and corresponding video as an enhanced content CD available now. ... more

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